Reality
This post is for Lois, Kristi, and Dana, all of whom were in my home Saturday for our church's bi-annual Homeschool Encouragement Day. Of course, the downstairs was neat and tidy (except I didn't mop the kitchen floor ) and so we talked about how easy it is to assume someone else's homeschooling house is always cleaned up. In fact, when my family was helping me get it into order, my oldest son said wisely, "Mom, if you really want to encourage the ladies, then we shouldn't be cleaning up." Ha! True. But I did want to make it a nice environment for everyone so we made sure the bathroom was clean and the clutter was at least tossed upstairs. But the challenge from the ladies above was to take pictures of our homes during the "real" times. Here you go, girls. These photos are from Sunday afternoon, 4:30 p.m.

Hmmm... the Sunday paper, half-eaten coffee cake, my ice tea glass with spoon, various other glasses, and the mess left from several children cracking walnuts on the counter in the background. Some kinda creativity goin' on. Drawing on walnuts and building with straws, complete with stuff on the counters and desk. When we re-do this kitchen, the desk is history. It's a stuff-magnet.

So now it's your turn. Anybody want to share the reality of life as a busy homeschooling household?

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Life with PreschoolersKendraComment
Homeschooling Moms Who Have Influenced Me-- Laurie Bluedorn
There is a lot I could write about Harvey and Laurie Bluedorn, but suffice it to say that I just have a lot of respect for both of them. Years ago we heard them speak on classical education and were a little taken aback by their laid back approach to the early years of homeschooling. But the proof is in the pudding, folks, and what their children went on to study makes my paltry 13 years of public education look like child's play. Often, however, we tend to have a starry-eyed view of those we've never met. If we finally do meet them, we find that they are human like us. Last spring on a whim, two friends and I were in Chicago during our annual get-together, and one of us said to the other two, "Wanna drive out to the Bluedorn's tomorrow? I'll call Laurie and see if we can come." She did, we did, and what a fun time it was. I loved seeing their home, filled with the obvious signs of years of home education. Beautiful artwork rendered by their children lined the walls. Books, books, books, which of course prompted us to ask which were their favorites. Johanna showed us her latest painting, there on its easel in her bedroom. There were cookies to share, and afterwards, someone in that home had to wash the plates, just like in our homes. See? They're normal. I asked Laurie to contribute something for my readers here, and this is what she sent. But don't cast it aside if you only have little ones. I think these are excellent things to keep in mind as our children are growing, particularly as we mother boys. They need us to respect them, and finding the balance between homeschooling/mothering and respecting them can be tricky. I thought I would share with you a few of the things I've learned over the past several years. This is addressed to parents of adult children, but parents of young children could perhaps benefit, since, in no time at all, you will all be parents of adult children. How to treat your adult children: 1. The majority of the time that you are talking with your adult child, you should be doing the listening, not the talking. Real and attentive listening. Respectful listening -- not appearing to be listening or thinking about what you need to be doing next or what you want to say next, but real listening. 2. Talk to your adult children in the same way which you would talk to any of your peers. Your body language, tone of voice, facial expressions, language, and level of respect should be the same as what you use with your peers. 3. There must be trust. The members of a family must trust each other. Without mutual trust there can be no family peace, order, fellowship, respect, or communion. 4. Address the concerns of your adult children in a timely manner. Don't continue to put off resolving issues or acting on matters, but have enough respect for your adult children to move forward, making decisions promptly on issues which are important to them. Don't be eternally saying, "Well, I'm praying about it." 5. Avoid exaggeration -- it undermines trust and respect. Exaggeration is a learned behavior and your children will most certainly adopt the behavior if they see it in you. 6. If children are exposed to a steady stream of negativity and criticism, leveled against them or against others, it will undermine their trust and confidence in you, and it will interfere with their ability to respect you. When the parent is negative and critical, his intended result is that the child will become more discerning and careful. But in actuality, the effect of steady negativity and criticism is usually the opposite -- it serves to pull down and inhibit growth, and causes the child to not take the parent seriously. 7. It is most likely that at some time in his life and in some area of his life, your adult child will disagree with your views on different issues, be it politics, nutrition, music, dress, courtship, or (gasp!!) theology. Have enough respect for your adult child to discuss these differences in the same way that you discuss differences with your peers. Good stuff, isn't it? Come back tomorrow and enter to win some beautiful prizes that Laurie has graciously donated, just for Preschoolers and Peace!
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Educating at Home, Guest WritersKendra Comment
Happy Valentine's Day!

I am not a seamstress, so those of you who are will laugh that I had to buy a pattern to make these fun skirts for my daughters. But what cuties they turned out to be! The pattern is Butterick B4722, and requires only basic sewing skills.

And you can't beat those $4 Valentine's t-shirts from Target

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Life with PreschoolersKendraComment
Eric

And he said:

"Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked shall I return there. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD." Job 1:21 Eric Davis went home to be with the Lord today. Please pray for his grieving family and our church family. God is good, all the time. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

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Musings and MiscellanyKendraComment
Battling Eczema
We have a darling girl in our home whom we once dubbed "Crabby Abby". Oh my. I'd never had nor been around a grumpier, more unhappy baby in my life. She cried for the first 15 months of her life, until we finally could put our finger on the source of the problem-- painful eczema caused by allergies to citrus and eggs. The hardest thing for me to learn in regards to eczema is that it doesn't have a cure. One of the first people I spoke to told me wisely, "You'll never beat it, you just have to learn to manage it." Once I came to grips with that fact, I set to work trying to make Abby's life as comfortable as possible. First, the allergies. I wanted to get to the root of the problem rather than just slap some steroids onto her skin. She was a baby, after all, and I knew there had to be a better way. We took her to an allergist who pin-pointed the trouble-makers as citrus and eggs. We immediately eliminated all sources of citrus in her diet, including citric acid which is a preservative used in just. about. everything. It wasn't easy. When she was around five years old, she announced that she wanted to eat eggs and so we told her she could, but that she had to realize what the consequences might be. That really was a turning point in her care because she took the reigns and has nicely managed it on her own ever since. In addition to eliminating and now allowing her to choose when and if to eat the foods that tend to cause her to flare up, we've made a few other changes. She sleeps with a humidifier going all winter long, because the cold, dry weather exacerbates the issue. I put a few drops of tea tree oil in the water to keep the humidifier sanitized, too. We used pure coconut oil for several years on her patches of eczema, but this past year we've used Miracle Skin Salve exclusively. The coconut oil was soothing but the Miracle Skin Salve not only soothes, it heals. Amazing. We passed some on to my mother-in-law who has suffered from eczema for 75 years and she has raved about it, too. Lastly, we try very hard to limit the time Abby is in hot water, and we don't use soap. The combination of the two sends her into scratching fits that can be heard down the hall from her bedroom. Again, she manages this and aside from a gentle reminder every once in awhile from me, I really don't tell her how long she should bathe or how hot the water should be. It looks as if eczema will always be a part of her life, and the better she becomes at managing it herself, the easier it will be to live with.
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Musings and Miscellany, ResourcesKendra Comment